Many of us on the planet at this time (I include myself in this post) did not get mothered or get our safety and nurturance needs met when we were children. Especially those of us that are very sensitive and creative. We might find it very difficult to be in the world today. A world that still does not truly value or understand a woman’s sensibility. Perhaps this too is why our mother’s could often not be there for us when we were little in the way we needed. Perhaps she abused us, neglected us or abused her authority by invading our space and sense of self. So we never got to understand who we are, alone; to ourselves; and often we are very angry about this.
My respite and healing balm has been to listen to the heartbeat of mother Earth. I go to the rivers and lakes for healing and I listen to the wind; trees and birds to heal my ears so I may hear others or hear myself. An teacher I heard teach years ago; he always taught the same thing. About healing your hearing; I thought, what is he on about. It took me many, many years to understand that the woods would heal me. In my soul were those howls from a baby who never got heard or consoled. Those baby cries that never got answered, so I cried myself to sleep on many a night; the years took a toll. Its very hard to heal that. The forest and Earth energies will wrap you in her bosom (just as its been for me) and rock that crying baby to sleep in her arms.
When I talk about healing to my sister’s who do the work, they often talk about women who have lost their babies. Who do they cry out for in the heat of healing, their mothers. Just before my sister died of cancer we were having an argument, she was staying at my house. She looked right into me, her grey expressive eyes unyielding; “Don’t you know I am in pain here?” I wrapped my arms around her and rocked her while she howled and cried. That was the most sacred moment I remember having with my sibling. By helping, mothering her when she needed it, I healed many things in myself.
During my forest walks I listen to the wind whispering through the pines. Listen, listen, listen and my ears get a little more clear. So I can reacquaint myself with my original nature, who I came into this life to be!
Lorraine Hughes ©2015
